IT was like any other day unfolding in the hood for Lazzo as he left the central business district of cosmopolitan Lusaka.
He had been social-networking with colleagues at the watering hole in the precincts.
It was here that for three decades he had become a household name to the patronage.
It came to pass that here were romantic skirmishes that saw two female patrons slug it out over him.
Time to troop out of the watering hole was nigh as the women walked along, there occurred a tiff between them on who was going to date Lazzo.
At the time, he was gracing the cloud silver lining as one of the contemporary magnates.
According to one observer, he fitted the description of the ‘dunku man’. The lingua franca term simply referred to one whose pockets were bulging with banknotes!
So the argument between the two women precariously hung on a thread of a banknote relationship.
In a flash of a moment, the two were at each other’s throats as they veered off course towards a nearby shop display window which shattered on their impact as they landed on it!
The commotion attracted some security guard in the proximity who became a principal witness.
At this time, Lazzo and his mentor were some metres ahead of the women. As soon as the sound of shattering glass imprinted the writing on the wall over the fracas, Lazzo cautioned his mate that they had to walk fast away from that scene lest they be implicated!
Yes, it was an episode way back in the past that Lazzo recalled as he lapsed into one of his introspections.
He recalled having confided in his mate that the major cause of  his woes under the sun were caused by women other than men!
As he arrived in the hood, he had an irate missus to contend with because she vividly saw red over Lazzo’s niece!
For some reason, Lazzo’s spouse did not like the idea of adopting the niece whom she considered rude and not amenable to discipline…
She further accused Lazzo of tolerating adolescent nonsense because that girl’s language sometimes bordered on insolence and lack of respect for her.
“In fact, you are the one who encourages this girl to think that she is also married to you!,” she thundered at Lazzo.
Now, it was apparent that he was not ready to absorb the outburst as his eyes popped out in rage and in a split second slapped missus.
She winced with pain as touched her left cheek like someone determining body temperature by feeling one spot of their body.
Lazzo deduced on the lines of the grapevine which spread the notion that some women became temperamental when they were entering the motherly way!
Lately, she had been terse and often hurled one-syllable answers when she was supposed to explain an issue.  Words like (iwe) meaning ‘you’ (sinifuna) ‘I don’t want’…
As soon as she had  removed her hand from the cheek, she stormed out through the only outlet of their two-roomed adobe brick house.
Something clicked in his mind and he decided to follow her after a few seconds of her exit.
It was clear that she was heading towards the police post to report the matter of  gender-based violence (GBV), Missus was the first to enter the lawman’s office as Lazzo followed suit.
“I have been assaulted by this man who is my husband and this is why I have brought him here…” she told a policewoman who appeared  too eager to settle scores in the dispute.
“Yes, what’s your name sir?,” she asked Lazzo who promptly replied looking towards missus:”Ask her my name and she will tell you,” said Lazzo.
After a few seconds, the policewoman told Lazzo:”You are a very rude man sir.  I asked for your name and did not direct this question to your madam,” she said as she steadied her pen to start writing in the big book beside her.
“Can you please get over this side where I am and wait a bit?,” she asked Lazzo who thought she was suppressing her discontent over his conduct.
Following some scribbling in the big book, Lazzo was told to remove his shoes and belt and get ready to join his mates in the cell.
A male cop appeared and escorted Lazzo to the cell which at the time was not spared the menace of load-shedding minutes after the recording of the GBV case.
As soon as the heavily barricaded door was opened and Lazzo showed his nose in there, he met with a cracking slap that he still talks about at the writing hole from one inmate!
He caused laughter at the watering hole when he disclosed that after that strike, he thought he saw some stars for a good two minutes…
While inside, he was subjected to some interrogation on what he had done and advised by inmates on how to handle his case.
The inmate presiding over the sitting told him to divorce his wife as soon as he got out of the cell.
It was early in the morning when Lazzo’s name was called out and he had won his freedom.
He got back his shoes and belt and the wallet and finally sauntered home where he found his missus ready to go and retrieve him from custody.
All the while he had been walking home, Lazzo was thinking about his future with his wife and two children and perceived misery for the innocent souls if he gave her the boot.
The news had reached the entire hood and everyone familiar with Lazzo as a radical character expect fireworks at his home after the gruelling time spent in confinement.
But when he looks back, Lazzo still had a premonition that the hood was surprised why to this day he still sticks around with missus.
However, he had learnt one lesson that the GBV legislation had come as a major saviour to women in the hood.
He thought the trend had come a long way from the olden days women were battered and later encouraged to think that a man who beats a woman really loved that woman.