WHEN a man and a woman come together and get married, they are said to have become one flesh.
Since the two have become one flesh, they are supposed to do things together.
However, it is sad to note that some marriages are characterised by hate, cheating, and dishonesty.
Often times, some husbands have been known to be dishonest not only by womanising, but also not saying the truth about things happening around them.
In some instances, some husbands do not announce to their wives when they get paid and it is common to hear some women complain that they do not know the dates when their husbands get paid.
Even when they have not been paid, but have chanced some money during ordinary days other than pay days, they do not inform their wives about this ‘chanced’ money.
Because they usually get home in a drunken stupor, with money burning holes in their pockets, some wives have resorted to searching the pockets of their husbands once they fall asleep.
Many times, men have complained about waking up and finding no money in their pockets when they were sure they had money when going home the previous night.
A number of husbands have confronted their wives accusing them of having stolen the money they had gone home with.
A couple of days back, I was in Kabushi Township in Ndola where I had gone to visit a friend, a Mr Chilufya, who had some issues to sort out with a young man who eloped with his daughter.
It was while Mr Chilufya was explaining the ordeal he was going through concerning his daughter and the young man when we heard some noise coming from Mr Chilufya’s neighbour’s house .
A woman at this house was shouting at the man who was undoubtedly her husband.
“Walitemwa amahule iwe. Ngei paketi yamakondomu nasanga mutumba yetoloshi lyobe naubonfyamo na yabili?” (You like prostitutes. What about this packet of condoms I have found in your trouser pocket and you have used two?), the woman was yelling on top of her voice.
As patient as a vulture, the man told the woman that it was not true that she had found the condoms in his trouser pockets because each time he lost money and politely asked her whether she had taken the money, she refused saying she was not the type of woman who would search the pockets of her husband.
“Ninsanga amakondomu mutumba yetoloshi lyobe. Wali ne hule,”(I have found condoms in your trouser pockets. You were with a prostitute) the woman insisted.
But the man also insisted that his wife was not telling the truth because each time he lost money from his pockets and asked the wife, she denied and swore that she never went through his pockets.
“When I lose money, you say you don’t go through my pockets. If you don’t go through my pockets, how come you found those condoms in the pockets you don’t search?,” the woman explained that the man told his wife.
The man asking his wife how she found the condoms in the pockets she did not search? This was quite interesting.
As the noise at my friend’s neighbor persisted, a number of people gathered to witness what was happening.
I was attempted to join the group of people trooping to that house so that I could also get first hand information on what was happening but my friend informed me that this kind it was not the first time that he had witnessed his neighbor quarreling with his wife.
However, I heard the man tell the wife that this time around she would pack her bags and go back to her parents because she was a thief who was always stealing his money and starving the family.
According to Mr Chilifya’s wife who had gone to the neighbor’s house to get  first hand information about what was happening, the woman was in the habit of searching the pockets of her husband and stealing money each time the man came home from  a drinking spree.
Each morning, the man discovered that the money he had gone home with was  not in the pockets and when he asked the wife, she always denied  having searched him and instead accused him of spending the money on beer and whores.
This time around, the man did not leave any money in the pockets, but bought a packet of condoms from which he removed two and hid them in his wife’s hand bag before the two went to sleep.
When they went to bed, the man pretended  to be  in deep slee.  Upon hearing the snores, the wife got up and as usual, went through her husband’s trouser pockets in which, like always, she expected to find some  money.
She received a shock of her life when instead of finding money, she found a packet of condoms with only one remaining – meaning that her husband had used two on another woman or women.
This finding  riled the woman who woke up her husband and showed  him the packet of condoms.
Mr Chilufya’s wife explained that when the woman continued showering insults on her husband, the man then told her that if she found them in his pockets, then she was the one who was stealing the money from his pockets.
She explained that as the argument heated up, the man told his wife that he had set her up by putting the condoms in the pockets and removing two which he put in her hand bag to make it appear like he had used them.
“He knew that she would search his pockets like always, but he did not leave any money there. He then got her hand bag and opened it to show her the two condoms he had hid in it. On seeing this, the woman was surprised and shocked. It is for this reason that he has asked her to go back to her parents,” explained Mr Chilufya’s wife.
She said this was not the first time that this woman had been accused of searching and stealing from her husband.
“The other time, the woman allegedly stole the money and hid it under the sofa and the husband searched the house until he found the money. Despite the man finding the money, the wife still refused that she had searched the pockets of her husband,” explained Mrs Chilufya.
At this point, Mr Chilufya pointed out that it was better to put the money in the open like on the table because this way the wife would know that if it got lost, she would be the first suspect.
I wondered whether this was what he was doing to prevent his wife from searching his pockets.
Nevertheless, after hearing of this incident, which was one of the many I had come across, I wondered why some wives and husbands don’t get along concerning money issues especially that they were one flesh. For comments:potipher 2014@gmail.com. 0955929796,0966278597.