THERE was a time when one commercial bank in Zambia attempted to entice people to open accounts with the bank, they even went a step further by opening banks in townships.
Today, many people have credit cards. The bank’s advert worked which told me that Zambians realised that there are benefits in opening accounts in the bank.
People naturally want to associate with something that gives them special privileges, and benefits!
In this case many are associating themselves with this bank.
I want to tell you about something that does offer very valuable and verifiable benefits – marriage!
How many people know that there are benefits in marriage? This is because I see so many people living and acting as though marriage has no benefits, hence they ask, “Does marriage have benefits?”
The answer is yes it has. Unfortunately many see marriage as being burdensome, boring and unsatisfying in life. Some see it as being “Shipikisha Club.” As a result many move around with complaints about their spouses day in, day out.
They see nothing good in life because of their distorted concept of marriage. All they see are thorns in their marriage and not the beautiful roses that make marriage colourful.
For the past 30 years that I have stayed with my wife I have discovered the following benefits.
Married people are much happier and likely to be less unhappy than any other group of people.  Meet them at their workplace or on the street, they carry a satisfying smile.
Dr Linda Waite conducted a research and found out that the incidence of mental illness is lower in married people as compared with unmarried or divorced people.
In developed countries it has been established that Married people live up to eight years longer than divorced or never-married people.
Some joke about this and say that life just seems to be longer for married men and women.
But it is an undeniable fact that a married person really does have a longer life span than his single counterpart who is single.
The single man is more inclined to live dangerously and to disregard his health than the married man.
And when he is sick, he is not as well cared for as the married man who has a wife.  The same goes for women.
Married people are less likely to engage in unhealthy behaviours such as drugs, immoral behaviour and alcohol abuse.
Many singles are very careless with their lives, This is why they are on the high risk, especially when it comes to HIV/AIDS.
They do not care where they sleep and with whom they go to bed with.  The married unfaithful are the ones who end-up getting HIV/AIDS.
People who are married have twice the amount of sex as single people and report greater levels of sexual satisfaction in the area of sexual intimacy.
Only a person who is or has been married can understand what it’s like to be in a marriage relationship.
The singles may have sex with this man or that woman but may not really know what sexual satisfaction is all about; this is something which can only be experienced and understood in a marriage relationship.
A study was carried out among six million people involving insurance.  The conclusion was that the married is far better off that his unmarried counterpart.
Another study, by Columbia University psychology professor Jonathan I. Freedman, shows that the greatest happiness for women, even in this liberated age, is still to be found in a marriage based on love.
The conclusion is that: married people of both sexes, whatever their age, are happier than the unmarried.
A lot of people today are hesitant to marry for a variety of reasons, but still have a strong desire to be in an exclusive sexual relationship, some opt for living together.
These may live together, but that’s not marriage it is sin (Exodus 20: 14).  They don’t experience the same benefits as those who are married.
According to Dr. Linda Waite of the University of Chicago, unmarried couples who live together receive less emotional satisfaction from their sex lives than married couples.
“Those who cohabit prior to marriage have been shown to be significantly lower on measures of marital quality and to have significantly higher risk of marital dissolution at any given marital duration” (DeMarris and Rao, 1992).
On the other hand Dr David Larson discovered that, “Couples not involved before marriage and faithful during marriage are more satisfied with their current sex life than those who were involved sexually before marriage” (Larson, 1994).
The benefits of marriage aren’t just for the married spouses, either. In addition, the children of married parents are less likely to engage in criminal behavior, abuse drugs, alcohol, experience emotional and psychological problems, become pregnant out of wedlock, and do experience less academic failure.
The Importance of Commitment cannot be overemphasised.  Couples who possess a strong commitment to their relationship experience the greatest benefits of marriage.
A strong commitment is typically not that difficult to maintain when the relationship is characterised by closeness and romantic love.
However, following this “romantic phase”, the marriage moves into a period of disappointment and disillusionment brought by the normal stressors of marriage, such as unmet expectations and the undeniable reality that one’s partner has faults. In other words, the rose-colored glasses become clear.
It is during this time that commitment to the marriage becomes a greater challenge as couples begin asking the question, “Is this all there is in marriage?”
It is no surprise that the couples most likely to own up to their relationship challenges and face them head on are those who maintain a shared commitment to their marriage.
Their commitment is based on the reality that life circumstances change and so must the marriage if it is to survive.
It is important to keep in mind that the investment you make in your marriage each day is likely to pay great dividends to both you and your family for many years to come.  Yes, marriage has benefits beyond measure.