IT is common for some married men to be immoral and reach the extent of leaving their matrimonial homes to sleep out.
Usually, this happens when money is burning holes in their pockets and they get to bars and night clubs where they hook or are hooked by scantily dressed sex workers.
But after spending the night out, the men get back to their senses after realizing that what they had done was bad and they had to go back to their families.
While this behavior of sleeping out may be so peculiar with some married men, it is absurd to find some married women sleeping out especially when they had babies to look after.
A few days ago, I was at a drinking place in Ndola’s Chifubu Township to have one for the road.
At this drinking joint, I found that the majority of guzzlers were women although there were a few men around.
So I settled on a table close to where some four women were seated sharing the beer.
About five or so minutes after I settled down, a woman, probably in her late 40s or early 50s, walked into the bar with a baby strapped on her back.
She walked around the bar as if looking for someone and when she appeared not to have found who she was looking for and was about to leave, one of the four women close to my table called :”Ba boyi, bushe tamutumwene?Twikele pano,”(Friend, haven’t you seen us? We are seated here.)
The woman walked to where the four women were while shaking her head.
“Ala bane namwishiba, ndimubwafya. Ndefwaya sister, umwaice wandi nomba nshilemusanga,” (You know my friends I am in trouble. I am looking for my young sister but I am not finding her), said the woman as she picked a bottle of big Eagle from the table and had a long swig.
When she put the bottle back on the table, the woman who called her commented that the sister she was looking for was old enough and there was no need to look for her.
“Sister obe mukalamba sana.Wanshi ulefwaya ino nshita?Ikalafye apa tulenwa”(Your sister is old enough. Why are you looking for her at this time? Just sit here we drink), said the other woman.
I saw the woman who was invited again shake her head and said:”Sister wandi kwena cipuba sana. Nangu bu ule kuti aya asha abalume no mwana?Aile mailo no kubwela tabwelele. Alilala out nanomba talabwela,” (My sister is very foolish. Although it is prostitution could she go leaving her husband and baby?She went out yesterday and she never came back. She slept out), said the woman.
The woman then fumbled in her bra and brought out a phone and dialed. and after some seconds, I heard her say:”Mary, I am here at (name of the bar withheld). Come and get the baby, I have not found her mother”.
The woman then pulled a chair and took a sit. The woman who invited her shook her head.
“So your young sister is married and the baby on your back is hers? Do married women also sleep out like us spinsters?), said the other woman.
This was interesting and as an eavesdropper, I wanted to hear more.
It was then that the woman who came with the baby started explaining that her young sister who was staying within the same township came to her home with her baby who was about nine or 10 months to visit and she thought she would go back to her home.
She said later in the day, around 18.00 hours, her sister left home leaving her child with her and she thought she was just within the vicinity but surprisingly, she(her young sister) did not come back home.
The woman said it was around 21.00 hours when her young sister’s husband called to find out why his wife was not getting home as it was getting late.
“My brother-in-law called asking why his wife was not going home because it was late. I didn’t know what to answer because she did not tell me where she had gone. I lied that she was sleeping and she would go home the following day), said the woman.
She explained that she thought her young sister would get back home later, but she did not do so until it got very late and everyone in the house went to sleep.
She said very early in the morning the following day, she went to check in the spare bedroom, but her sister was not there.
“It was then that I decided to call her, but her phone was off. I started panicking because I thought her husband would call again. Fortunately, he has not yet called and it is now 19.00 hours. I have looked around in many places but she is nowhere to be seen. What Am I going to tell her husband if he calls again?” complained the woman.
Presently, a girl, probably in her teens, walked in. and the woman unstrapped the child and handed him to the girl.
When the girl left, the woman continued talking about her young sister and the other four women were listening attentively.
Another woman in the group chirped in and commented that probably the woman was just accusing her young sister of having slept out when she probably could have been in trouble somewhere.
“You may be saying your sister went to sleep out and yet she may be in problems. May be she was attacked or maybe she was picked up by police for idling,” said the woman.
On hearing this, the woman responded that she knew her sister very well and she was sure she was out with another man because this was not the first time she had done that.
“She usually sleeps out, but when she does that, she comes back home very early the following day. It is now 19.00 hours and she is nowhere to be seen. If she comes, I will chase her. She will go to her home. Nalyupwa ine kuti andetelela(I am married, she can cause problems for me) lamented the woman.
Another woman joined in and said while it was common for men to cheat on their wives and sleeping out, it was very unusual for married women to sleep out even if they were away from their homes.
She was still talking when the phone of the woman whose sister was being talked about rang and after answering it, she said it was her daughter, Mary, who called informing her that her young sister had come.
She looked at the beer bottles on the table and clapped her hands.
“Nalaya ubwalwa nga bwapwa. Nalaya mutanfya,” (I will go when the beer is finished. I will go and chase her), she said and I laughed.
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